Bert the Conqueror

Bert attempts to walk on water to conquer a lobster crate race in Maine.

Bert wildly sprints downhill attempting to finish before a roll of cheese.

Bert tackles Michigan's top thrills such as a backyard "Abusement Park."

Bert enjoys thrill rides, roadside attractions and hanging with monkeys and mermaids in his home state of Florida. His journey ends at the Greased Pig contest, where he chases a greasy, muddy pig and the winner gets to keep it.

Bert faces his fear of heights by riding Colorado's highest thrill rides, including Denver's tallest roller coaster.

Bert suffers an injury before dashing through an inflatable obstacle course.

Bert journeys up the West Coast en route to the great Seattle Tomato Battle, where combatants fling 15 tons of tomatoes at each other inside a confined space. Will Bert survive the onslaught of flying tomatoes?

Bert races an ATV over a mud pit at the Midwest's Eagle Mountain Mud Fest.

Bert flies down a ski jump turned waterslide, competing for biggest splash at a summer camp; the world's tallest, fastest and longest wing coaster.

Bert prays he can outrun a colossal plastic ball down a 1,000-foot hill; America's tallest free-body waterslide.

Bert tests America's future thrill rides and rides military tanks to crush cars in Georgia's Tank Town USA.

Bert rides boardwalk coasters, trains sea lions, enters a Bonnie Knees contest and faces his fear of heights by rappelling down a 16-story building.